Oh Em Gee...I have a journal...

Easter Bunnies

Sat, 08 Apr 2006 19:25:14 GMT

I just got done being the Easter Bunny. Now I'm all hot and sweaty and my hair went back to being wavy again. ;.;

I'll update this journal later, because I only have a few more minutes left for break. I'll probably edit it later than I plan, though, because I want to play more KH2 still. (I got it last Friday and still haven't gotten very far with it.)

By the way, I'm ashamed to say that I have a myspace now, in case you're interested.

I'm back!

Thu, 23 Mar 2006 20:31:17 GMT

Okay, I have updated for a month. -.-

I actually just took a quiz that I found in Katy's journal, but eventually I'll have a myspace up and running and I'll have a couple of journal entries about my past month.

And here I thought I'd be right back on the Internet once ToDAY was over. Nope, I was wrong. I've just been in a two-week long depression and showing ToDAY withdrawal symptoms. Anyway, on with this quiz thingy. Comments by me on this quiz later.

Your Existing Situation
Needs, and insists on having, a close and understanding relationship, or at least some method of satisfying a compulsion to feel identified.
(Um...how 'bout no?)

Your Stress Sources
Disappointment and unfulfilled hopes have given rise to an anxious uncertainty, while doubts that things will be any better in the future lead to the postponement of essential decisions. This conflict between hope and necessity is creating considerable pressure. Instead of resolving this by facing up to making the essential decisions, she is likely to immerse herself in the pursuit of trivialities as an escape route.
(Um...slightly accurate, but we won't go into detail with this one. I just find it slightly humorous that now all of a sudden the results changed the wording to "she is" instead of "you are," like the results are talking about me to someone else. It's kind of odd.)

Your Restrained Characteristics
Remains emotionally unattached even when involved in a close relationship.
Willing to become emotionally involved and able to achieve satisfaction through sexual activity, but tries to avoid conflict.
(No comment whatsoever. And Molly, if there's anything going through your head about this, I don't want to hear about it.)

Your Desired Objective
Intense, vital, and animated, taking a delight in action. Activity is directed towards success or conquest and there is a desire to live life to the fullest.
(...and travel around the globe as a flight attendant! Yay!)

Your Actual Problem
The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond her capabilities, or her reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety and a sense of personal (but unadmitted) inadequacy. She attempts to remedy this by intense activity and by insistence on getting her own way. Faulty self-control can lead to ungovernable displays of anger.
(I thought it would be funny to say, "I don't have anxiety or a sense of personal inadequacy" since the results say that it's unadmitted, but then I figured, that's exactly the kind of remark people would expect me to make. So I'll shock everyone and avoid making a comment that people would expect me to make. See, I'm just full of surprises.)

Your Actual Problem #2
Disappointment and the fear that there is no point in formulating fresh goals have led to stress and anxiety. She wants congenial contact with others and scope for development, but feels that her relationships are empty and her progress impeded. She reacts with an intense and zealous activity designed to achieve her aims at all costs.
(I'll admit that I don't have very many close friends, but does that mean my relationships are empty... @.@ That doesn't really work with "needing and insisting on having a close and understanding relationship," does it?)

By the way, you can find the quiz at http://colorquiz.com. Take it.

The day after yesterday.

Wed, 22 Feb 2006 22:44:21 GMT

My vagina hurts. ;.;
Hannah sent me her love/care through something that has to do with Alan Rickman. She rearranged the letters on the refridgerator in the library's breakroom so they'd say, "EMILY IS MRS. ALAN RICKMAN." ^.^ So I added, "AND KIDS."

Blah.

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 21:20:17 GMT

Oops. I haven't updated in the past couple of weeks. That's okay, though. I doubt anyone's been waiting on the edge of their seats, anyway.

Anyway, I suppose the reason is because I've been in one of my "bleh" sort of moods lately. I've been feeling unexplicably down lately, and I haven't been eating as much as I probably should (of course, I rarely do), and I've been randomly touchy and cynical throughout the past couple of weeks. But I haven't cried, so that's good. I've never actually cried for no reason before, so at least I know I haven't completely lost it at all or anything.

But, hey, guess what? It's Alan Rickman's 60th birthday today! ^.^ I made a comic and put together a birthday picture and stuff. I was going to make a 60 day long raffle thing on Gaia Online, but I decided not to. I'm not usually on the Internet long enough to maintain something like that. But that's okay. It's the thought that counts.

So, if you love me, send something my way. Preferably an Alan Rickman picture that has been edited in celebration of his birthday or something that has to do with him and his hotness.

Survey

Wed, 15 Feb 2006 23:15:46 GMT

*[HAVE YOU EVER...]*
...been kissed?	No.
...lied to a friend?	Yes.
...dressed punk?	^^;;
...kissed a girl?	Not yet. Molly keeps resisting.
...saw something you didn't want to see?	@.@ Don't remind me...
...danced in the rain?	naked...or at least in a bathing suit.
...went barefoot in the snow?	No.
...played hockey?	No.
...made your own clothes?	Yep! A Chinese shirt! ^.^
*[IN THE LAST 24 HOURS]*
Have you gotten in a fight?	no
Have you taken a shower?	yes
Have you given a dirty look to someone?	I don't think so...
Have you cried?	No.
Have you done a cartwheel?	No.
Have you gone to school?	Yes.
Have you gone shopping?	Yes.
Have you danced?	No.
Have you gotten sick?	I was sick, but I didn't get sick...
Have you done something you now regret?	No.
Have you discovered something new?	Yes.
*[IN SCHOOL, YOU...]*
...run to to class because you're always late?	No.
...act perfect?	No.
...act hyper?	More like a littler perkier than some...
...act like a nerd?	No, just a dork.
...are in band?	No.
*[RIGHT NOW YOU ARE...]*
...in your pajamas?	False.
...drinking?	...water.
...listening to music?	No.
...watching a movie?	No.
...IMing or texting someone?	No.
...talking on the phone?	No.
eating	No.
*[NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT CLOTHES]*
Hot Topic or Abercrombie and Fitch?	Hot Topic
Thongs or briefs?	Briefs, but only because I don't like things digging up my ass.
Boxers?	Only in skirts! ^.^
Sweatpants or jeans?	Jeans.
Long-sleeved shirts or short sleeves?	Short.
Tube tops or tanks?	Tanks. Because I have no boobies, and tube tops would only make it more obvious.
*[DESCRIBE YOURSELF AT THIS VERY MOMENT]*
Current clothes:	Hoodie and jeans and socks and clogs.
Current mood:	A little down
Current music:	None.
Current taste:	Chocolate.
Current make-up:	None.
Current thing you should be doing:	Eating chips on break, which I am doing right now.
*[LAST PERSON...]*
...you hugged:	Erin
...you yelled at:	Derek...but I wasn't really yelling at him.
...you IMed:	Ooh...I don't remember, really.
...you touched:	I pushed my sister.
*[EITHER/0R...]*
Coffee -OR- hot chocolate?	Hot chocolate
Big -OR- little?	Big
Lace -OR- satin?	Satin
New -OR- old?	Old...people
Vogue -OR- Cosmopolitan?	Cosmopolitan
Skirt -OR- dress?	Skirt
Wool -OR- cotton?	Cotton
*[DO YOU...]*
...put on a "front"?	Yeah.
...have a crush on someone?	Not at the moment.
...know where you'd get a tattoo if you got one?	Yep. My butt. ^o^
*[RANDOM QUESTIONS...]*
What is the online emoticon you use the most?	^.^
Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend?	No.
Who's hotter, Josh Hartnett or Chad Michael Murray?	Actually, I'm more of an Alan Rickman kind of person, myself. Besides, Josh and Chad are probably too young for my taste. ^.^
What was the last thing you said?	"Actually, I'm more of an Alan Rickman kind of person, myself. Besides, Josh and Chad are probably too young for my taste."
Who would you want to be stuck in an elevator with?	Alan Rickman. @u@
Do you like stickers?	Sometimes.
Do you play with Mad Libs when you are bored?	No.
Are you suicidal?	No.
Is your window open?	No.
What was the last pair of shoes you bought?	$5 Boots at Shoe Carnival.
Do you have a little brother?	No.
Does he draw you cute pictures?	I don't have a little brother.
Where do your grandparents live?	In Kentucky.
What do you think of when you hear the word "click"?	Chicken.
Are you a moron?	No.
Do you like trampolines?	Yes.
Have you ever accidentally sucked something up in the vacuum?	No.
Did you see American Pie 2?	No, and I think it's time for this survey to end.
Do you cut yourself?	No.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

Oops. Missed a few days.

Sat, 11 Feb 2006 15:22:45 GMT

So, yeah, I didn't go to school yesterday.

On Thursday I should have stayed home, but I didn't want to miss rehearsal (plus I'm missing it on Monday) so I went to school that day anyway because my mom would've kept me home from rehearsal, too. And Thursday would've been a good day to stay home, anyway. Because I wasn't feeling so great, I was a little irritable...but I finally realized how annoying Ashley is. We're doing a nutrient project in our Nutrition and Wellness class, and we got protein. So we're working on it in the library, and I'm looking up easy recipes that are high in protein that we could use for our demo. Everything I found, she turned down, because it had something in it that she didn't like. I expected her to turn down one or two things, sure, but she's a really picky eater and doesn't like a lot of things. (...which I don't understand. Maybe my logic isn't what it used to be, but why would someone sign up for a food class when they're a really picky eater? And why would you work at Dairy Queen's Orange Julius store when you've never liked smoothies to begin with?) This isn't the first time that she's been like this. Last semester, in our Frontier America class, we had to make a house out of side. After 15 minutes of whining about how disgusting it looked, she all of a sudden said that she was allergic to grass. Sure. How convenient that you just remembered. Luckily our group was allowed to merge with another group of three and we just gave her crappy jobs to do.

Okay, back to what I did Thursday. I did some character work on Lymen Lovejoy the Cattle Farmer and all three of my Satans. Rick Bush made me talk louder than usual, so that messed up my throat even more. So I stayed home sick yesterday.

Which, of course, was the day I had to talk loud enough to be heard on the phone because I got a call from the guy at Cedar Point for an interview over the phone. ^.^ (I applied online Thursday, and Jennie O. called him to say nice things about me.) If I'm lucky, I might have a job there. If I'm unlucky, I'll get a job there and the library can't put me on temporary leave, which means I'll lose my beloved job here. ;.; But I'll only work at Cedar Point as long as I don't have to sweep or do anything non-customer related. I'd rather not waste time getting experience I don't need when I could keep my current job and get a job waiting tables or something to get the required customer service time needed for a flight attendant job.

Anyways, I'm hoping Erin's mom lets her apply for a job at Cedar Point. Maybe then we could room together.

Ugh.

Tue, 31 Jan 2006 00:57:42 GMT

Okay, the first time I ever saw Danielle (my co-worker...ish thing) was last year. Well, actually, it was during story time with Miss Nikki, but I don't remember that. But anyway, as far back as my memory goes, I first saw her last year. And I remember thinking, "She looks like she'd rather be anywhere else right now." See, I didn't understand that. Why would she not want to have a job at the library as opposed to having a job that involves people yelling at you because someone else put catsup on something they didn't want ketchup on (Hah. Two different ways to spell "ketchup/catsup" in one sentence. Beat that.).

But now, here I am. One year later. Wishing I could be somewhere else. -.- I want to be at ToDay's Rehearsal right now. I should call Erin later and asked her what we did. But first I have to call Molly, because I have an important announcement to make to her. (But that big announcement has nothing to do with me being pregnancy or anything.)

...Okay, my break's pretty much over.

Hey, kids!

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 21:26:54 GMT

Kathy: "How many pages does it take to clean a library?"
Pages (Danielle and me): "How many?"
Kathy: "Two, because Emily keeps throwing things and laughing."

Blah.

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 04:02:37 GMT

Got bored. So I took a bunch of quizzes.

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy.

They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder.

It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment.

They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

Okay, everyone, make sure you leave a comment and tell me if this is true.

Your Brain's Pattern

You have a dreamy mind, full of fancy and fantasy.
You have the ability to stay forever entertained with your thoughts.
People may say you're hard to read, but that's because you're so internally focused.
But when you do share what you're thinking, people are impressed with your imagination.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

Sure.

Who Should Paint You: Alfred Gockel

All American yet funky, you inspire an artist's imagination
And while not everyone will understand your portrait, you will!

What Artist Should Paint Your Portrait?

Thanks Devon for answering one of the questions for me!

What Your Sleeping Position Says

You are secretly sensitive, but you often put up a front.

Shy and private, you yearn for security.

You take relationships slowly.

You need lots of reassurances before you can trust.

What Does Your Sleeping Position Say About You?

Your Personality Profile

You are dependable, popular, and observant.
Deep and thoughtful, you are prone to moodiness.
In fact, your emotions tend to influence everything you do.

You are unique, creative, and expressive.
You don't mind waving your freak flag every once and a while.
And lucky for you, most people find your weird ways charming!

The World's Shortest Personality Test

Your Daddy Is Darth Vader

What You Call Him: Pops

Why You Love Him: Because he's your baby daddy

Who's Your Daddy?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay I'm done.............wait. HAHAHAHA!

You are

What Rejected Crayon Are You?

Your Hair Should Be Pink

Hyper, insane, and a boatload of fun.
You're a traveling party that everyone loves to follow.

What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?

Hey, they used my word. "Buttload."

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is traditional. Without saying anything, both of you communicate with your hearts.

Your risk of cheating is low. Even if you're tempted, you'd try hard not to do it.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Your Personality Is

Artisan (SP)

You are both grounded and flexible. You adapt well to new situations.
You are playful and free spirited - but you are also dependable and never flaky.

You don't do well in conservative, stuffy situations.
It's probably very hard for you to keep a normal job or stay in school.

You are always up for fun and adventure. Most people are too boring for you.
You take risks and bend the rules. And if things don't work out, you chock it up to life experience.

In love, you tend to take things quickly - but you have a huge problem with commitment.

At work, you need to make your own rules. You're best suited to be an entrepreneur.

With others, you are animated and physical. You prefer doing something with friends to just hanging out.

As far as your looks go, you tend to be buff and in good shape. Your spend more time on your body than your clothes.

On weekends, you need to keep active. From cooking up a storm to running a 5K, you wear yourself out.

The Three Question Personality Test

Yeah...but no.

Your 2005 Song Is

Beverly Hills by Weezer

"My automobile is a piece of crap
My fashion sense is a little whack
And my friends are just as screwy as me"

You breezed through 2005 in your own funky style!

What Hit Song of 2005 Are You?

For the record, these quizzes so far are as accurate as they are inaccurate. -.-

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

In relationships, you tend to be a bit selfish.

You need your space and privacy. You don't like to be smothered.

You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.

You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.

How Are You In Love?

...or so they would think, wouldn't they?

Your Blogging Type Is the Private Performer

Now I'll add my comments in here.

Your blog is your stage - with your visitors your adoring fans. ...or friends/minions. Whatever you call them.
At least, that's how you write with your witty one liners.</sarcasm>
And while you like attention, you value your privacy. Okay, they've got me there.
You're likely to have an anonymous blog - or turn off comments. But this isn't anonymous, and my comments are turned on. I win.
So, this quiz result is pretty much off, but since I took it and got this result, I'll put it up here.

What's Your Blogging Personality?

Boredom...

Thu, 26 Jan 2006 21:41:27 GMT

Teehee. I stole a quiz from Devon. ^.^

Name: Emily
Birthdate: March 12
Birthplace: Toledo
Current Location: Toledo
Eye Color: Hazel...with mostly blue
Hair Color: Reddish-brown
Height: 5' 0.25"
Weight: 98 lbs.
Piercings: Ears
Tatoos: None
Overused Phraze: Anything with Alan Rickman in it...

FAVORITES
Food: Chicken
Candy: I'm actually obsessed with lemon drops...and that obsession just started today.
Number: 3
Color: Red
Animal: Owl or kitty
Drink: Tea...with honey or sugar
Alcohol Drink: Pina Colada
Bagel: Cinnamon raisin
Letter: B...because that's the letter I randomly hit.
Body Part on Opposite sex: Laugh lines and grey hair...just kidding. ^.^ I don't know. I guess the most defining thing about men is the penis, so...
This or That
Pepsi or Coke: Blegh. Neither. >.<
McDonalds or BurgerKing: Burger King. Because I used to work at McD's.
Strawberry or Watermelon: Strawberry
Hot tea or Ice tea: Hot tea
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Hot Chocolate or Coffee: Hot chocolate
Kiss or Hug: Ah! No touchies!
Dog or Cat: Kitty cat
Rap or Punk: Punk
Summer or Winter: Summer...even though it would be better if it wasn't so hot.
Scary Movies or Funny Movies: Funny funny hah hah!
Love or Money: Money. Unless I end up marrying Alan Rickman. Everyone knows there'd be a lot of love in that relationship.

YOUR...
Bedtime: Whenever I feel like it.
Most Missed Memory: I'd answer this, but Molly would fuss over it.
Best physical feature: ...my hair? And I'm skinny.
First Thought Waking Up: 'Nnnn...nine more minutes...'
Goal for this year: Live.
Best Friends: Erin.
Weakness: ...
Fears: ...
Heritage: A little bit of French and Irish, and a buttload of German.

HAVE YOU...
Ever Drank: Yes.
Ever Smoked: No.
Pot: No.
Ever been Drunk: No.
Ever been beaten up: No.
Ever beaten someone up: No.
Ever Skinny Dipped: No.

IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color: I don't care.
Favorite Hair Color: Die if you bleach it.
Short or Long: Doesn't matter. Just as long as it never gets longer than mine.
Height: Taller than me...which isn't hard to do.
Style: ...clothes would be nice.
Looks or Personality: They can't look or act younger than me.
Hot or Cute: Hot and sexy beast, yo. @u@
Drugs and Alcohol: Preferably not, but I'm not their mother. They can quit on their own as long as they don't come crying to me because they have cancer or some kind of liver disease.
Muscular or Really Skinny: If I can beat him up, then I'd have to hit him with a big probably not.

RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past: Loads.
What country do you want to Visit: Loads.
How do you want to Die: Um...sometime after I've married Alan Rickman...?
Been to the Mall Lately: Couple of weeks ago.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Sure, until they beat up my electricity.
Get along with your Parents: Dad=No. Mom=Usually.
Health Freak: No.
Do you think your Attractive: Hah hah! Oh...you're serious. No.
Believe in Yourself: I believe I'm real.
Want to go to College: Yes.
Do you Smoke: No.
Do you Drink: No.
Shower Daily: No. I just say I do. >u<
Been in Love: Yes, but Alan doesn't know me yet.
Do you Sing: I'm in a musical! ^.^
Want to get Married: Only if it's Alan Rickman.
Do you want Children: No. Not even with Alan Rickman.
Have your future kids names planned out: I'm not having kids, but if I did, I'd have to name my first son Testosticles, because I already promised Mr. Zielinski that I would.
Age you wanna lose your Virginity: ...
Hate anyone: Sure.

Thu, 26 Jan 2006 20:33:53 GMT

Got bored after school today, so I took some quizzes from Molly's latest journal entry.

You scored as Loner. YOU HAVE NO SOCIAL LIFE! thats ok.

Emo Kid

53%

Loner

53%

Punk

33%

"Ghetto"

27%

Stoner

20%

Geek/Nerd

13%

Goth

Prep

Hot

Jock

What Highschool Clique Do You Belong To?
created with QuizFarm.com</table>

Hah hah. I scored a 27% for the ghetto category. Probably because I put a definite "yes" answer to "You've said 'fo' shizzle.'" Everyone who knows me knows that I've said it a lot, but only in imitation.
...Damn for the emo thing, though.

You scored as Wrath.
Seven deadly sins
created with QuizFarm.com

Exciting news!

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 17:40:08 GMT

Okay, so I'm sitting in the library during lunch and decided to go here to see what other movies Alan Rickman is in. I found out that he's actually going to be in two more movies coming out (not including "Harry Potter," because it's obvious he'll still be in those). One is "Nobel Son" and the other is "Perfume: The Story of a Murderer," which is apparently based off of a book. So if anyone is feeling generous...Emily would love to see these movies when they're out in theaters... ^.^

sigh

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 02:58:22 GMT

I swear...my mom is going to be the death of me.

Honestly, I'm not trying to sound like some over-dramatic teeny-bopper kid that is spoiled rotten but is still convinced that my parents hate me, but my mom defines "mood killer." Seriously, I now know where Jon gets his drama queen traits. The tiniest thing gets her in a depressive mood, and that brings everyone down.

Okay, I'll tell you what happened on the way home from ToDay since you're probably wondering where this all came from. (Of course, I don't know who I'm referring to when I say "you," because it's not like many people read this thing anyway.)

When the staff of ToDay Productions tries to gather people into a circle, they sing a song. This year, we have a slow song that puts people to sleep, and the only line I know is: "Love your neighbor as you love yourself."

When I was telling my sister about the old, bouncy gathering song, we started talking about the new one that came up this year. My sister mentioned the last line ("love your neighbor as you love yourself") and I said something like, "I guess I hate my neighbor, then." My mom caught that and the stick up her ass moved, and she all of a sudden started demanding why I hate myself.

Honestly, what does she expect? Look at how my life has been so far. I have very few friends, I don't do anything exciting ever, the only interesting perk in my life is ToDay Productions (which lasts only a few weeks), I've never been in any kind of relationship with anybody, and I've only had two major things happen in my life--one good, and one really bad. How does she honestly expect me to "love myself" when every time I look back on the past 17, almost 18 years of my life, I'm not even close to being happy with it? And how can I expect something out of my life when my one major goal is to not make the same mistakes she's made?

Now you're probably like, "Well, what mistakes has she made that you want to avoid so badly?" If you're not wondering that, then too bad, I'll tell you anyway.
1. She didn't go to college, cutting her off from her dream job.
2. She worked as a clerk at a library before she had children, which meant that she did the same boring, repetitive stuff day after day.
3. She got married before living with her husband, you know, in order to see if she could handle being married with him, and now she's miserable in her marriage.
4. She became a stay-at-home mom at the birth of my brother, her first child, which cut her off from having a strong social life, so now she's lonely and she only has me to unload her problems on.
5. She chose to live in Toledo, which provides very little excitement in her life.
6. And back to the marriage thing, she married a man that didn't love her as much as she loved him, so that adds to her misery.

In case you hadn't figured it out already, my mom's miserable with how her life is. I don't want to be like that, and so far, I am unhappy with how my life has been so far (good thing it's only been almost 18 years, though). Of course, I can't tell her all of this, so I'm stuck with a cold shoulder and depressing atmosphere around the house. At least she's letting me off easy this time.

Okay, I'm done ranting and raving, because now it's depressing me even more.
-----------------------------------------------
If anyone's curious to know, this is how I intend to run my life based on her mistakes:
1. I'm going to go to college and learn a couple of foreign languages, so when I become a flight attendant, I have a better chance of flying internationally, which will give me a good change of scenery every now and again.
2. Since I gave up on being a librarian and chose to be a flight attendant instead, I know I won't have the same boring job.
3. If, in the unlikely event that I will get married, I'll make sure I'm living with the bastard for a couple of years to make sure I can handle him when we actually have the damn marriage license.
4. I will not be tied down by children and I don't intend to isolate myself from people any more than I already do.
5. I will live in a big city, like NYC or something, and get out of the hellhole that is Toledo.
6. And if, in the unlikely event that someone will want to date or even marry me, I'll always make sure that he loves me more than I love him.

Hey, ever-body.

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 19:38:00 GMT

I finally realized what I want to do with the rest of my life. For the past few months, I was torn between being a librarian and being a flight attendant. But then something happened today at work that made me realize what I wanted to do.

Okay, being a page at the library is a lot like being a mailman. Just like how the mail never stops coming, neither do the books. No matter how many we put away, there are always more on the shelves behind the circulation desk. But for some reason, I never get bored. Then this little girl and her mom were at the library. She was probably about four-years-old. She left her mom and started wandering around and found me in the non-fiction section in the 600s. She started chatting away at me, talking about her favorite color and what was on "Dora the Explorer" a couple of days ago, when all of a sudden I realized: I liked listening to this little girl talk. And I like when random things happen at work that don't usually happen here every day.

Then I finally made my decision. I want to be a flight attendant. As a librarian, I'd rarely get a chance to see or experience something different every time I'm working. As a flight attendant, no day is the same as any day. It's all completely unexpected. And that's what I want in my life-long career. I want something different to happen every day.

Okay, that's all I have to say, mainly because my break's pretty much over.

And today is Katy's birthday, so go to KeddyPie's journal and wish her a happy birthday!

AH!

Mon, 16 Jan 2006 02:12:57 GMT

This decades project for my Humanities class sucks butt. I don't know why everyone in my class AND my teacher were making a big deal about it. It's as boring as two hours of math class.

The Psychology project was a lot more stressful, but at least it was interesting.

Happy belated birthday, Nana!

Sat, 14 Jan 2006 19:09:03 GMT

Since the past few days have been so uneventful, I'll tell you about my grandma.

Yesterday was my grandma's birthday. But she's not my grandma. She's Nana. I won't tell you how old she is, because I don't know. Just know that she's old enough to have grandkids. Because that's what we call her.

So, her Friday the 13th birthday kind of sucked and went very well at the same time. She went for a check up at the doctor that day, and found out that she had clogged arteries. Apparently, it was so bad that she had to have open-heart surgery soon. So her doctor asked her if she wanted to wait until Monday for the surgery since yesterday was her birthday. Being the kind of person that she is, she said, "No, let's do it today and get it over with."

While all of this was going on, my Aunt Cheryl was calling my mom frequently to give her some updates. (Keep in mind that Nana lives in Kentucky, and that's why my mom wasn't rushing off to be with her mother.) The doctor had told them that while they were in the middle of surgery, they found out that 99% of her arteries were clogged, and she probably wouldn't have lived through the weekend without surgery.

Anyway, she got out of surgery at around 4-5 p.m. yesterday, and she's fine. Which is good, because if she died, my mom would be depressed and my grandpa would spend the rest of his life with my methane-filled, control-freak of an uncle.

The End.

"That's it. Get movin'."

So...yeah...

Fri, 13 Jan 2006 02:09:56 GMT

Today brought everyone's mood down...at least at the end.

I found out that Erin's dog had to be put down. Erin and Sonya were crying at the rehearsal...and it was sad. So, to anyone that's reading this, tell Er-head and her family that you're sorry for her loss. Why? Because it's a nice thing to do...and I like seeing that I have reviews.

Anyway, to make things better, over a span of a couple of days, I have created the hottest desktop theme in the world. The desktop looks this and the welcome icon looks this.

Okay, Molly's on the phone, so bye!

Retreat!

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 00:55:24 GMT

Oh Em Gee, I am tired.

I went to the retreat last night, and it was a buttload of fun. But I'll do a journal-edit to this thing, because I don't feel like taking the time to finish it right now. I'm way too tired for that.

ToDAY Retreat is today!

Sat, 07 Jan 2006 17:50:03 GMT

So today is the retreat for ToDAY Productions, and I have to work all day at the library. Normally that wouldn't bug me, but I'm going to be watching the clock all day because I can't wait to get there. Not to mention the fact that I can't wait to get home so I can eat...because I won't be doing much of that here. My lunch break started at 11:50, which means that it ends at 12:50. I called my mom and asked her to get me some McDonald's or something, and she told me that she had to drop something off first. That took place at around 12:00. I just called her at 12:30, and she was just pulling away from the driveway. So I cancelled that order, because I won't have time to eat it.

So now I'm left hungry and only ate a small bag of chips and a Snickers bar. ;.; It's not going to be 5:30 soon enough for me.

But anyway, yesterday my grandma took my sister and me out to see "Chronicles of Narnia" (actually not a bad movie) and we stopped at the Salvation Army on the way to the theatre so I could get my jean skirt and pair of jeans for the parts I play in the musical (we have to bring them with us to the retreat). It was kind of weird. Twilight Zone weird. There was only one jean skirt left (that we saw, anyway) and it fit me just fine, so we're like, "Oh. This is good." Then it got weird. First pair of size 1 jeans that I find, I try on. It fit me better than any pair of pants that I have ever owned. So I bought both of them, and by the time I got home, I decided that I was going to have to find a different pair of jeans to take to the retreat, because anyone in a career in fashion design or anything like that would slap me if I took a $5 pair of perfectly-fit jeans to be altered and put on stage.

Brother's B-Day.

Fri, 06 Jan 2006 01:12:49 GMT

It's my brother's 19th birthday today.

...but no one cares. Cool.

Yesterday I was called down to the counselor's office. I've been "approved" to work in the Computer Networking room as a teacher's aid. ^.^ Katy says I can help her clean, since she's pretty much the only one who does it. (But that's because she apparently can't keep her man-bitch busy.) But this is awesome-ness, so be happy for me! >u

I should really stop stealing entries from Katy...

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 22:13:21 GMT

^.^ Saw this on Katy's profile and figured I'd go for it.

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
Did a 80 degree turn in my life and changed a few things.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't make resolutions...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Bandit.

5. What countries did you visit?
None. ;.;

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
I don't know...maybe I could trust people more...?

7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Sometime in July because I finally started letting go of my old self. (I've always hated how I was.)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting a good job at the library.

9. What was your biggest failure?
-.- I don't know, I failed a lot. Um...I failed at keeping a job at McDonald's but I don't really care.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
New kinds of clothes. (No, I'm not one of those self-absorbed girls that buys herself new clothes all the time. I'm referring to a new kind of clothes...when I finally started realizing that I looked better when I actually dressed like a girl. I got rid of all of the old, baggy clothes in my closet and replaced them with feminine looking clothes that make my boobs look a tad bit more noticeable. Now I wear completely different kinds of clothes, and now I'm just realizing that this is probably the most I've ever put in a pair of parenthesis.)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
I don't know, so I'll just say Charles' for putting up with Katy.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Brian's. He actually made me cry in Criminal Justice.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Christmas and birthday presents.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
ToDAY Productions, making my own shirt, and that one week in this summer.

16. What song will always remind you of 2005?
"Twilight" by Vanessa Carlton.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you

i. happier or sadder?:
Less depressed but a little more irritable.

ii. thinner or fatter?
Lighter, maybe, because I had DDR this past year.

iii. richer or poorer?
Richer. I don't know how much money I had with me a year ago, but I have a buttload more money in my savings account now.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Looking back, I wish I would have talked more.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Dwelling.

20. How will you be spending New Year's?
Teehee...I already spent it. I was at Glenn's.

22. Did you fall in love in 2005?
Yes, but I'm giving Alan Rickman some space before the two of us hook up.
Just kidding...I don't know, really. Define "love." (Wow, I really ask for a lot of defining in these surveys, don't I?)

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Seinfeld?

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't know who I already didn't hate.

26. What was the best book you read?
"Memoirs of a Geisha"

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
"Once Upon a Mattress" was my only musical discovery.
...
What? It says "musical."

28. What did you want and get?
A job.

29. What did you want and not get?
A nicer attitude in my cat.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
"Memoirs of a Geisha" (except Nobu wasn't as hot as he should've been! He still had his arm!)

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
It was the second showing of "Once Upon a Mattress" and I was 17.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Um...a faulty memory.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Same guy's jeans with a couple of Hot Topic pants, and black shirts with weird phrases on them, but then that progressed to a small amount of color, and then I started getting more and more color and got rid of a lot of the black.

34. What kept you sane?
ToDAY Productions. It did the year before that, too, when it saved me in the nic of time.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Alan Rickman.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Gay marriage.

37. Who did you miss?
No one, really, except for Ibrahim during the last week of December.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Ibrahim.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
(Isn't this the same as question number 16?)
"And I will never see the sky the same way and
I will learn to say good-bye to yesterday and
I will never cease to fly if held down and
I will always reach to high 'cause I've seen
'Cause I've seen
Twilight"

My opinion on the year 2005:
Extremely lonely at first, then I started focusing on changing a couple of things more. I don't know. I guess most of the loneliness might still be there, but not so much anymore.

Oops....

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 20:25:03 GMT

Okay, it's time for backdated entries, because I've forgotten to update in the past few days. ^.^

Anyway, I started working on a new theme for my Gaia profile using CSS. It's actually easier than I thought...just as long as I have a couple of code references, that it. So, my theme to start out is (surprisingly not Alan Rickman) Tidus and Yuna. >u< I don't know why. I guess I just had a sudden inspiration after playing Final Fantasy X (my favorite game) again.

Anyway, since I can't work on the profile now that I'm on my brother's laptop, I'm going to start working on my backdated entries.

Questions! Yay!

Wed, 28 Dec 2005 19:40:11 GMT

Meh heh...I stole this thing off of Katy's journal.
69 things you may have never known about me:

1. Initials:
EJF

2. Name someone with the same birthday as you:
Liza Minnelli

3. Where was your first kiss?
Define "kiss."

4. For or against same sex marriage?
For.

5. Are you homophobic?
No.

6. Are you racist?
No, but I've been accused of being racist after I told a black guy I didn't like him. -.-;;

7. Do you believe in God?
Nope.

8. How many U.S states have you been to?
Ohio, Michigan, Kentucky, South Carolina, Tennessee, Indiana, and driving through North Carolina...that would be seven.

9. How many of the U.S states have you lived in?
One.

10. Have you ever lived outside the U.S?
I wish.

11. Name something you like physically about yourself:
My hair.

12. Something non-physical you like about yourself:
Come back to me on this one.

13. Whats your moms first name?
Lori

14. What is your dream car?
Rental.

15. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?
Ooooh...toughie. I'd either go to Japan or straight to Alan Rickman's bed.

16. Have you ever had someone of the opposite sex sleep over?
My brother's friends have slept over, but I don't think that counts...

18. Do you download music?
Sometimes.

19. How many illegal things have you done?
@.@ I don't know...more than 5, less than 75...?

20. Where would you want to go on a first date?
Some public place.

21. Would you date the person who posted this before you?
No. Katy's straight...and Charles is too nice to steal her away from him. ^.^

22. Has anyone ever sang or played for you personally?
No.

23. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
No.

24. Do you like president Bush?
No.

25. Have you ever bungee jumped?
I wish!

26. Have you ever white water rafted?
I wish again.

27. Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you?
Yeah. That crazy, middle-aged, schizophrenic guy with a limp on the Administration floor of the Main Library when I went to fill out papers and get my work permit signed.

29. Have you met a real redneck?
No.

30. Are you anerexic?
Not right now. I usually have a period of not eating for a few days, but that is related to my period.

31. What song are you listening to right now?
Nothing now.

32. What is your current favorite song?
"A Song for XX" by Ayumi Hamasaki.

33. What was the last movie you watched?
"Remember the Titans"...but it will soon be "Love Actually" (because Alan Rickman's in it)

35. Where was the last place you went besides your house?
Work.

36. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone elses property?
Yes. April, Brenda, and I clogged the keyholes of a bunch of bulldozers and covered them with mud.

37. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex?
Yes...not including pulling Devon's hair. @.@

39. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
How old they look...? I don't know.

40. What really turns you on?
Old men...that don't really look that old. Some kind of defining physical quality. Tactless...ness. Money. Tightwads. Vague Irish accents.

41. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Never had Starbucks...but I guess I'd order a cappucino or something.

44. Say something totally random about yourself:
O.o I have itty-bitty boobies.

45. Do you have an ipod?
Nope.

46. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
My grandpa told me that all of my pictures (other than my Senior pictures) reminded him of Mona Lisa because I never smiled.

48. Do you have braces?
I used to.

(I figured out an answer for #12. I like the fact that people can label me as "brutally honest.")

49. Are you comfortable with your height?
5'0" I wish I could sprout up to 5'2" But the good news is that height requirements for flight attendants are lowering, so if I decide to be a flight attendant, I have a shot at that.

52. do you speak any other language other than english?
I know a couple of words in Japanese and very basic phrases in French.

55. Have you ever ridden in a limo?
No, but I dream of the day when Alan Rickman and I will share one. ^.^

56. Has anyone you were really close to passed away?
The closest was Bandit.

57. Do you watch MTV?
No.

58. What's something that really annoys you?
My sister...and being interrupted.

59. What are some things you really like?
Alan Rickman, anime, Final Fantasy, my job at the library, my kitty, fortune cookies, ToDAY Productions, and reading.

60. Do you like Michael Jackson?
I don't have a problem with him...

61. Can you dance?
No.

62. Have you ever surfed?
No.

63. Do you know how to pump gas?
Yes.

64. (Where the crap did it go? O.o Okay, I'll make one up.) Name one thing that you were really excited to open on Christmas.
The "Memoirs of a Geisha" gift set from Bath and Body Works.

65. What's the latest you have ever stayed out?
'Til 7:30 in the morning. ToDAY retreat. ^.^

66. Have you ever thought that you were honestly going to die?
On a few occasions.

67. Were you ever rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room?
Yes. Sledding accident in 6th grade. I passed out and I couldn't move my back.

68. Have you ever been dared to do something you didn't want to do?
Only if it counts when someone doesn't directly say, "I dare you." He just kind of hinted at a dare.

69. Where do you want to live?
In a big city, or in Alan Rickman's bed.

Yay! "Memoirs of a Geisha"!

Fri, 23 Dec 2005 16:38:09 GMT

"Memoirs of a Geisha" finally comes out in theaters today! Woohoo!

Molly and I are going to see it tonight...well, this afternoon, anyway. We're catching the 3:25-ish showing and then we're going with my family to the "Lights Before Christmas" at the Toledo Zoo. (Yes, Molly's mom is actually letting Molly go out to Toledo for a whole afternoon/evening. Of course, I shouldn't say that about her. Molly's mom just got her gallbladder removed and surgery done on her foot. They just celebrated her sister's birthday at the hospital yesterday.)

Anyway, if you're reading this, reply to the entry and say "hi" to Molly, even if you don't know who she is!

In case I don't update tomorrow or the day after...

Merry Holiday And
Enjoy Your Freedom Fries!

R.I.P. Jazz/Bandit/Zorro - The feline quartet is a trio again.

Wed, 14 Dec 2005 23:24:59 GMT

               Have you ever seen a cat that's been split in half, with it's bones and organs crushed right along the middle? I did. And I'll tell you how glad I am to have already decided that I didn't want to get into crime scene investigation, because if I felt like throwing up after seeing our kitty like that, I can't imagine how I would react to mutilated human bodies...or maybe the effect today was stronger just because it was more of a shock.
               There was this kitten that started hanging around our house in the middle of fall. He couldn't have been more than two or three months old. We kept a box and some food outside for him, because we couldn't just turn him away, and he was more of a people cat than all of the other strays around our house are. My sister started calling him "Jazz"...though no one knows why. My mom renamed him "Bandit" because of the markings around his face. (I later renamed him to "Zorro" because he looked like he had a little Zorro mask on...but "Bandit" seems more like a pet's name, so I went back to calling him that.) He was so cute, too! Here's a couple of pictures of him:

               We think he was somehow related to our other cat Chopper because Chopper came from a litter of kittens that had been dropped off in our neighborhood a few years back, and we still see strays that looked like him running around. Plus, they looked so much alike.
               Anyway, so we couldn't let him inside because we didn't have money to get him neutered or de-clawed (my parents believe in de-clawing -.-), and Chopper had marked his territory a few times. We kept him outside for a while before finally moving him into our garage where it was a little warmer.
               My dad loved that cat. I actually believe that he loved Bandit more than he loved my mom. He spent a lot of his time out in the garage, eating microwaved meal and watching the little TV he set up. When it started snowing, he went out and bought a plug-in heater thing to keep the garage warm while he was out there, and the heat would stay inside for most of the night so Bandit could stay warm. My dad said he needed interaction with people and that's why he was out there so much. He got plenty of attention...probably more than what we gave our own cats.
               And he was a playful little thing. I'd always go out in the garage and night and he'd be chasing the laser pointer for a really long time. My sisters and I kind of almost sorta taught him how to play tag, and he usually played with our dog's tail when she was wagging it back and forth.
               The only problem we had was that he liked to go outside whenever we opened the garage door. But then we learned that shaking the food bowl would make him come running back into the garage as soon as he was out, so then the problem was solved.
               We actually lost him once. He went outside and didn't come back later like he usually did, and we were thinking he was picked up by someone or somebody called some animal shelter about him and they came to collect him. But when my mom was coming back home from picking up my little sister, he was sitting right in the driveway waiting to be let back in.
               Then today on the way home from school, my mom, sister, and I were all laughing about something, and as we're pulling into the driveway, my mom opened the garage door with the automatic...garage door opener (...?) and then I heard her say, "What the heck?" Then she and my sister Amy started screaming, and I looked up. He was lying there, half in the garage and half out, eyes closed, body split apart, a small puddle of melted snow and blood around him, and just plain dead because he was too damn stupid to move out of the way. I think I screamed.
               My mom jumped out of the car, crying her eyes out, yelling, "I swear I didn't know! I didn't mean to do this!" Amy was in hysterics. I kept looking from my mom (who was grabbing a towel and running to him, yelling, "Oh, Kitty, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to!") and my sister and back to the cat. I'm a person that has only been to one funeral in my life, and the only animals that have died on us were fish, all of those instances were due to natural causes. I think I was in a lot of shock. That's probably it. I didn't quite believe that he was dead at first. Then I just got out of the car and walked down the street...and somehow I eventually walked to Value City.
               I don't really remember the walk that well. My feet and my mind were doing two different things. I couldn't see anything but the ice in front of me and Bandit lying there. I couldn't think of anything but how long he must have been there, how long it took him to die, how Megan (my 11-year-old sister) was going to react and who was going to tell her, how much my dad will hate my mom even though she didn't know he was there, and what would I have done if it had been my cat, my Skittles. (I think I eventually came to the conclusion that I would've killed myself or I wouldn't have returned home so soon.) And I kept hearing my mom and my sister from the point when my mom said, "What the heck?" to when I couldn't hear them screaming anymore when I was a block and a half away from home.
               When I went back home, I found out that my mom was already out looking for me. She came home and told me that she didn't mean to, and I told her that I knew. I don't think she believed me, because when my grandma called today, she decided to give me some bullshit about how I need to back my mom up and how it wasn't her fault and how my mom would probably worry about me blaming her all day and die in a car accident on the way to work and we'll be more upset over the cat than we would be over her. (Yes, my grandma, who lives down in Kentucky and has never come up for my mom's birthday and sometimes shows up for Christmas and New Year's; who also calls us to make sure that we make sure my mom has a good birthday and tells us to do something special for her when what my mom really wants for birthday or Christmas is for her family to all be together so she can stop telling me, her 17-year-old daughter, about all of her personal problems because she has no one else to talk to.) I told her that I don't know why she was telling me all of that because I didn't blame my mom and I never would, then I gave the phone to Megan. Then I later called Erin.

               Okay, so if you're still with me, then thanks for taking the time to read this.

Oh Em Gee...I have a journal...

Easter Bunnies

I'm back!

The day after yesterday.

Blah.

Survey

Oops. Missed a few days.

Ugh.

Hey, kids!

Blah.

Boredom...

Exciting news!

*sigh*

Hey, ever-body.

AH!

Happy belated birthday, Nana!

So...yeah...

Retreat!

ToDAY Retreat is today!

Brother's B-Day.

I should really stop stealing entries from Katy...

Oops....

Questions! Yay!

Yay! "Memoirs of a Geisha"!

R.I.P. Jazz/Bandit/Zorro - The feline quartet is a trio again.

sigh